“...and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.”

- Matthew 6:12

Too often we confuse forgiveness and reconciliation. On an individual level, forgiveness takes only one person— reconciliation takes, at the very least, two people. You can forgive someone and never reconcile with them, but you cannot truly reconcile with someone without forgiving them first.

In teaching us to pray, our Lord speaks directly to forgiveness. Jesus tells us to pray for “forgiveness of our debts” and to “forgive others for their debts against us.” Our Lord uses a derivative of the word “opheilo” for debt, meaning something due morally, a fault of a certain kind. Metaphorically, Jesus means sin. We are to pray, “God, forgive us of our sin, and lead us to forgive those who sin against us.”

Why would Jesus include this in our prayer to God? Jesus understands that Scripture does not allow us to divorce our relationship with God from our relationship with our fellow men. Jesus is reminding us, God will not hear our prayers for forgiveness if we pray them full of contempt, bitterness, and resentment towards others. “Lord forgive me, even though I am not willing to forgive others...” is a prayer of hypocrisy.

Loved one, those who receive grace from God are instructed to extend grace to others. You cannot expect to be forgiven if you are not willing to forgive.

Who in your life, right now, do you need to forgive? Reconciliation is optimal but not yet possible. Forgiveness comes first and only involves you. Right now, who do you need to forgive? A spouse? A family member? A friend? A co-worker? Someone in your church? Who in your life are you holding hostage by bitterness and resentment? Jesus commands you, “forgive them.”

Jesus reconciled us to God by first forgiving us of our debts. Reconciliation was possible because forgiveness was certain. Jesus paid the debt of our sin on His cross, and when He finished paying, real and lasting reconciliation began. Those who were far from God were brought near to God by His work on the cross (Eph. 2:13).

Do you feel far from God today? Do you feel as if God does not hear your prayers for mercy and forgiveness? Perhaps you are not experiencing the forgiveness you desire because you are unwilling to extend that same forgiveness to others. Loved one, remember, you cannot expect to be forgiven if you are not willing to forgive.

Your prayer today: “Father, forgive me of my sins... and help me Lord, help me to be quick to forgive those who have sinned against me.”

Press on,
Pastor Harp

Use This in Your Personalized Scripture Journal

As you reflect on Matthew 6:12, take time to write through these prompts:

·       Is there someone I need to forgive?

·       Am I holding onto resentment or replaying past hurt?

·       Do I fully understand how much I’ve been forgiven?

·       What fear or pride is making forgiveness difficult?

·       What would freedom look like if I truly released this offense?

Jesus connects our experience of forgiveness with our willingness to extend it. That can feel challenging — but it is also deeply freeing.

Use this space to write a prayer asking God to soften your heart and give you the courage to forgive.

Frequently Asked Questions

What does Matthew 6:12 mean?
This verse, part of the Lord’s Prayer, teaches believers to ask God for forgiveness while also extending forgiveness to others.

Does this mean God won’t forgive me if I don’t forgive others?
It highlights the connection between receiving grace and offering grace. A forgiven heart is meant to become a forgiving heart.

Why is forgiveness so difficult?
Forgiveness often requires humility, surrendering pride, and releasing the desire for control or justice.

Does forgiving someone mean excusing what they did?
No. Forgiveness releases bitterness but does not deny accountability or boundaries.

How can journaling help with forgiveness?
Writing helps clarify emotions, uncover hidden resentment, and invite God into the healing process.