Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
- Ephesians 4:32
Why is forgiveness so hard?
Is it that when we forgive, we somehow feel we gave up our right to be heard, correct, or for justice to be delivered?
Maybe it’s because we think forgiveness lets the offender off the hook.
So, what does it mean to forgive?
Forgiveness is dismissing a debt or releasing the person from our thoughts.
In other words, we cease and desist. Forgiveness isn’t natural, and it isn’t conditional. It doesn’t rely on our feelings.
It is a choice. We choose to dismiss the resentment we feel toward the person who offended us.
When we do this, we release our right to hear, “I’m sorry.”
In addition, instead of fostering bitterness or how to get even, we trust God’s goodness and justice. However, that is not to say that certain offenses don’t require seeking appropriate justice.
Forgiveness isn’t letting someone off the hook or excusing their sin against us.
It is, however, turning them over to the Lord.
It also doesn’t mean reconciliation of certain relationships where there has been harm or abuse.
God calls us to forgive because He forgave us. When we forgive, we release the person who hurt us to God. It clears the way for God to work. We were never intended to carry the anger and bitterness that unforgiveness causes.
Forgiveness lightens the load. It lessens the heaviness in our hearts, letting light into the dark spaces again.
However, it is a choice. Sometimes, it feels safer and even justified to hold onto our pain. But, when we forgive, we free ourselves from the depression, discouragement, and bitterness that unforgiveness causes.
Prayer: Lord, it goes against everything in me to forgive. I ask you to help me forgive those who have hurt me so deeply. I trust you to bring healing to my aching heart. Amen.
With Love,
Sherry Shepherd
